The Nanny With Her Hands Full

thedaytonnannies
Sep 7, 2018
3 min read

To the perfect nanny who sat with her crew at the play area on Wednesday, I’m sorry you felt like I didn’t have the same right to be there. You see, we have been having some rough days. My nanny kids and I needed a fun day. We headed to Fairhaven with the same hopes of playing and enjoying being around people. I have always had this idea that as caregivers we were in this secret club. Nanny Sisterhood? Something along those lines. We are in the trenches together day In and day out. I know that every single one of us has wonderful, out-of-this world great days and that other days leave us feeling exhausted and like we need a nap by noon. We were having one of the latter. I wanted to turn the day around and let my little ones enjoy the play area. J3 was excited during our car ride and Baby E was babbling all the way in. So when you first walked up to scold J3, I was a bit taken aback. You were quick to use a harsh tone on a child you didn’t know. This isn’t how I speak to my kids. Then I felt your gaze and your whispered sharp words, “she shouldn’t be here. She has lost control of him. Her hands are too full. She really should just go home.” Nanny shaming is apparently a thing. The camaraderie I usually feel when I’m surrounded by other nannies was shattered with pointed words meant to put me down and make me feel less than. And I allowed it to. Because all of my insecurities were suddenly validated. Maybe I didn’t deserve to try and have fun with my nanny kids. Maybe I’m not good enough, worthy enough, in control enough. Thank goodness for grace. I’ve surrounded myself with strong women in this profession with enough empathy to remind me that I am more than enough. They are the best cheerleaders on the rough days and I am so thankful for this Nanny Tribe. I was upset with you for judging me and saying these things. But I’ve decided to forgive you and move on. Maybe you haven’t had days like this. Perhaps your nanny children are unicorns and haven’t been defiant or mouthy at the most inappropriate times. So when it finally happens, (because it always does) I want you to know that you have a Nanny friend in me. I will be here to remind you that you are an incredible caregiver. That you work one of the most emotionally demanding jobs and are a rockstar for it. If you need a place to vent, I will be available with an open ear and an empathetic heart. And I will celebrate your successes and accomplishments in this field. I will do all of this because I know that I wasn’t wrong about this Nanny Community. I believe that those of us who have chosen this career know better and will always strive to do better. And as my picture says below, I’m feeling a bit indestructible when it comes to my faith in Nannies and Women supporting each other.